Not everyone likes change. Some are comfortable precisely
where they are and prefer to stay within their comfort zone. Others are more adventurous and enjoy a good
challenge. They are more open to trying new things in order to experience
something new or perhaps to learn something that will positively impact their
life. There is one change, however, that everyone resists: that is when others
tell us we must be someone other than who we are. They may try to persuade us
to change our way of thinking or the way in which we do things. Those with low
self-esteem or who are fearful of rejection may succumb to the demands of
others. For everyone else, it is arrogant and disrespectful to ask anyone to be
anything other than who they are. Yet deep down inside, we know that everything
in the universe is in a constant state of flux and that the opposite of
movement is stagnation. So is it possible to actually change without changing? Consider
the following:
What can't I change? First and foremost, I need to
acknowledge who I am. I am a child of God, a sacred creation of the Divine Source
of Love. Who I am intrinsically is pre-ordained. Just as I cannot change my DNA
which is given to me by my biological parents, neither can I alter my inherent
nature. I am love; I am kindness; I am forgiveness; I am all that is sacred and
holy. I am one with Divine Energy. I may be athletic or artistic, shy or gregarious,
spontaneous or cautious. I may possess a propensity for that which is contrary
and bring it forth to some degree but I can never amend my fundamental self,
nor is it necessary since God only creates perfection.
What I do have the ability to change without changing myself
are the following:
Perception: I can alter the way in which I perceive
life, individuals, myself, and situations. Since it is my perception, and not
reality, that dictates the choices I make I can teach myself to view all of the
above from a more insightful and truthful perspective. I can remove judgments
of those who differ from me and replace them with understanding and acceptance.
I can look at all of life's challenges and injustices as opportunities in
disguise. Each can be a gift for me, thus enabling me to be more appreciative
and less angry at their appearance in my life. I can remove the notion that
life is unfair and view it for what it really is: exactly fair. Each of us gets
exactly what is necessary for our personal and spiritual growth. I can see
myself though the eyes of patience and compassion rather than condemn myself
for my perceived flaws and mistakes.
Attitude: Attitude is easier to change than most
realize. Attitude is a combination of what we think and how we feel. All
feelings come from the thoughts we choose to entertain in our mind - our
internal dialog, what we say to ourselves. A
bad or negative attitude can ruin my day, sabotage my relationships,
impact my health and success in life, and overall make me miserable. If I
cannot change my circumstances I can certainly change my attitude about them.
Behavior: It is also necessary to change my behaviors
at times. I would not consider behaving as I did when I was three years old or
as I did as a teenager. As I grow and mature, periodically it is necessary to
re examine how I do things, how I treat others, and how I treat myself. In any
given situation and with each specific individual, I may need to alter my
actions in order to better accommodate each.
But why should I change? As I stated before, the opposite to
change is inertia, being motionless. When water becomes stagnant it becomes a
breeding ground for bacteria and the stench is repugnant. Water that is in a
state of motion supports life. Change allows for growth and
improvement not only for the individual but for all those affected
as well. When I change my perception, I can view an issue as an opportunity
rather than an obstacle. My attitude enables me to take a positive approach to
life verses a pessimistic one, thereby ensuring I more fully enjoy my time on
this Earth. When I readjust my behaviors, I make smarter choices that result in
greater rewards and fewer consequences in every aspect of my life.
One would not consider wearing the same items of clothing
day after day. Changing one's clothing is necessary for good personal hygiene
plus our wardrobe also impacts how we feel about ourselves and how the world
perceives us. And it affects the nature of our relationships as well.
Periodically, it's healthy to replace worn out clothing or items that no longer
fit us with more suitable attire. So it
is with periodically changing our perceptions, attitudes, and behaviors. Each
one impacts our mental outlook on life, the choices we make, and the way in
which we interact with one another. Through a process of change and growth, we
can continually improve our lives and experience greater happiness and more
inner peace. And that eliminates anger.
So go ahead and change but don't change a
single thing about you. Intrinsically, you're perfect just the way you are.
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