Michelle joined me as my guest on today’s show. She’s a
young mother going through a nasty divorce. Children are involved as is a
marital home (now in jeopardy of foreclosure) as well as struggling business.
That’s a lot for one person to handle. Understandably, Michelle is dealing with
issues of anger, bitterness and resentment.
Twenty minutes on air is not nearly enough time to give her all the tools
she needs to resolve this.
We all find ourselves in situations where we feel helpless
and at the mercy of others. Relentless ex’s continually harass us, trying to
make our lives a living hell. But we are capable of turning the tables on them
(no, not making their lives more miserable than ours). We can actually take an
injustice and benefit from it.
The Dalai Lama says “there are no victims in life only
students.” How does that apply here? I learned 30 years ago not to be a victim
of divorce. I changed my perception and saw myself as a student of this life experience
instead. What was this divorce here to teach me? What lessons was I supposed to
learn? How could I take those lessons and apply them to become a better person
and enrich my life? Not an easy task but certainly not impossible. When I was
able to answer each of those questions, I realized I actually benefited from
his decision to leave me. Wow! What a revelation! What I tried so hard to hold
on to was in essence not good for me. Once I learned to let go (and let God),
my life became easier, my happiness was restored and my confidence soared. I’ve
taken that lesson and applied it to every trauma I’ve endured.
How can I possibly be angry with someone who inadvertently
blessed me by posing a great challenge? When we rise to the occasion rather
than drown in self-pity, we realize that in any given situation we have the
ability to determine how it’s going to affect us. I am deeply grateful for the
hidden treasures in the trash delivered by my ex. No room for anger here, only
gratitude. Not sure if Michelle was convinced.
Your thoughts?
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